Nischaya Tamulam: The Official Acceptance Of The Marriage Alliance
In an arranged marriage, after the bride and the groom give their consent to get married, the parents set out to search for a suitable alliance for their child. If the parents find someone suitable, they proceed with talks. Horoscopes are exchanged, and if they match, they proceed further. The horoscopes are matched so that the couple may have a bright future.
Significance of Nischaya Tamulam in Kannada Lingayat Weddings
The Lingayats are particular about horoscope matches and the alliance proceeds only if they are astrologically paired well with each other. If all goes well, then an auspicious day is fixed for the Nischaya Tamulam(engagement ceremony) where the day of the wedding is finalised. Some families even print beautiful engagement invitation cards to distribute to their near and dear ones. In olden days, the engagement day was the first formal meeting of the boy and girl, but nowadays, only after both the guy and girl consent, the engagement is fixed.
The Nischaya Tamulam is the 1st of the wedding rituals in the Lingayat Community of a Kannada wedding. In the Nischaya Tamulam, the groom gives sweets, coconuts, betel leaves, betel nuts and a traditional silk saree which is decorated in a tamulam (a plate) to the bride in exchange for a wedding dhoti and sweets from the bride's side. Traditionally, the Nischaya Tamulam is when the wedding date is fixed making it the official acceptance of the alliance amidst much fanfare. It is also the time when the close relatives of the bride and groom get to know each other.